Thursday, March 14, 2024

Whirlwind

That’s the most apt description of my state of affairs since I’ve returned home from Arizona. Coupled with the busy-ness and the speed at which the days whiz by, everything seems to take me longer. I don’t focus as well and find myself taking frequent rests and breaks. 

This isn’t a malady exclusive to me. Others my (ahem) age have reported the same.



I have a problem with non-productivity. Not sure where in my past this comes from, short of my inherited work ethic. Thanks, Dad.

Contributing to the whirlwind is my tendency to take on too much, sign up for anything and everything, while underestimating the time and energy required.  

I joined a Facebook group of people trying to declutter with various degrees of success. They post their dilemmas, frustrations and tips for how they’re making it work. So after several days of reading their posts, I got the declutter bug and I’m going after it with fervor. And in doing so, I’m learning much about myself. 

Weeding through my collections of things, it’s little wonder I’m constantly overwhelmed. I have more stitching charts, fabric, threads and supplies than I could possibly use in several lifetimes. Scrapbooking and card making? Yep, paper, tools, ribbon, embellishments—more than it’s even possible to use. Knitting—you got me there, too. Every size knitting needles, yarn and patterns fill a cupboard and big basket. 

Do we have to talk about my books?  Bookshelves overflowing, stacks of books in various places, boxes of books under the bed. The more I try to thin them out, the more they grow. They’ve taken over the house. It would be near impossible to read them all.


So I’m trying to figure out how to declutter my mind. Having so much stuff and accumulating more and more and more takes up valuable real estate in my head. I’m slowly and painfully working on letting go and bringing my collections to a more realistic and manageable level. Why does that sound so good yet is so hard to do?

It’s tough getting there and it’s a slow process. There’s mourning involved in letting go. But I’m after the freedom that comes with the effort, freeing my mind, freeing my time, freeing my space.

Sigh….

Thanks for visiting today and reading my random thoughts.

Wednesday, February 28, 2024

Homeward Bound

On Sunday, I will board a plane headed for Minneapolis. I’ve been here in Arizona since November caring for my friend and former neighbor. Now my work here is done.

Leaving Arizona is bittersweet. On the one hand, it will be nice to be “home, sweet home.” On the other hand, this retirement resort park is where George and I spent thirteen fabulous winters and the reality is I may never return.

My neighbors here on J Street in Mesa are the “salt of the earth” kind of people. It’s not just a street to live on, not just a block where your house is, but a family neighborhood. We laugh and cry together, mourn those who have passed and welcome newcomers. We help each other when a need arises. We keep in touch when we’re apart during the summer months by way of a Facebook group and sometimes by text messages. And one by one, we reunite in the fall.

Some play tennis; some golf; others hike. We walk, ride our bikes, drive our golf carts, play cards, enjoy crafts, work in the wood shop, dance, or just pull out our lawn chairs to sit in the sun, which is an open invitation for anyone and everyone to join you. Bring your Coke, water or a beer.

But what sets us apart from other streets is our every-Monday afternoon Happy Hour with a chicken 🐔 toss and chicken ⛳️ golf. That’s right, chickens. Well, plastic ones anyway.

Yes, we have a course set up on the street; yes, we are very competitive; and yes, we have trophies. The course is a tough one and the object is to toss the plastic chicken into the hole. The problem is the hole doesn’t stay stationary and tends to wobble. But our girls persevered.


There are other things that set us apart as well, and makes J Street unique. For example, we have a mayor. And an official flag. And an official anthem. All of which we take very seriously.

Mayor Denny calls us to order with his official wooden microphone and the first order of business is to pay homage to our flag. And our anthem? 

I don’t wanna be a chicken   🎶 
I don’t wanna be a duck. 🎵 
So I shake my butt. 🫨 
👏 👏 👏 👏 

And this is complete with hand and body actions, and of course, do-si-do-ing. We also get a report from President Glen on the most recent board meeting, how our stock is doing, etc. Oh wait, I forgot to mention most of us own stock in J Street’s own Naked Egg, Inc. company. You think I’m making that up?


We’re also known for our assorted array of Jell-O shots, a large tray of which is made each week by Greg and Mar, and on which we’ve all come to rely. The food table rivals any smorgasbord and we have our own cookbook.



So if I cannot return to J Street, my memory bank is filled to the brim and I am forever grateful for these lovely people who bring so much joy to every gathering. They hold a special place in my heart.


Thank you for taking the time to read my random thoughts.









Sunday, February 18, 2024

Misunderstood

Introverts are often misunderstood. I am an introvert. 

While extraverts draw energy from action and being with and among people, gatherings and activities, introverts get their energy from a calm atmosphere and time to be reflective. Introverts are somewhat inhibited; they rebuild their energy from quiet time, and time alone. They work well independently.

There are some major misconceptions about introverts. One is that we are shy, reclusive and antisocial. Nothing about this is true. The dichotomy is that I am introverted while being an outgoing and social person. My personality can be described as a joiner, a leader, a group player.

And I present this persona. Because it works. Because it is more acceptable. Because I don’t want to appear unfriendly. And because it’s necessary. 

But my first thought in a crowd—at a party, at church, a class reunion, really any large gathering—is how and when can I escape? I feel out of place and exhausted within the first few minutes. True confession time: I often excuse myself to go to the ladies room. Not because I’m in need of it, but because it’s private and quiet. I get a reprieve for a short time, then I’m refreshed, at least temporarily. When I was working, I chose a bench to sit on with my lunch and my book, rather than eat in the cafeteria. 

If you know me, you may be very surprised at this because it’s not what you see. But again, it’s characteristic of an introvert and it’s how I’m wired. 

I read an article recently about introverts in the church. Acting as if they’re conforming, introverts may not even be paying attention when the hymns are sung, the prayers are said or the sermon is preached. (Side note: I love my pastor’s sermons and hang on to every word, mulling it over while other parts of the service are going on.) The article goes on to say that the church needs both types, extraverts and introverts alike, to function and fulfill its mission. 

There are personality tests to determine your type, and they may even surprise you. The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator in one such tool and is often given in the workplace to determine how staff interact with one another and to inform how they are productive with very different tasks and in different environments.

The Myers-Briggs inventory is based on the theory that people experience the world using four principal functions: sensation, intuition, feeling and thinking, and that one of these four functions is dominant for a person most of the time. The test measures four categories: introversion/extraversion, sensing/intuition, thinking/feeling, and judging/perceiving. Each person is said to have one preferred quality from each category. (Wikipedia)

My results, although some years back, indicated I am I N T P.  Introverted—Intuitive—Thinking—Perceptive. This explains why I like to work alone, read and undertake projects independently, carefully ponder pros and cons when making a decision or taking action, and look at the big picture (sometimes rushing to offer solutions).

So there you have it. Now you know what makes me tick. But, again, the world is richer for all of us with all types, don’t you think?


Thank you for taking the time to read my random thoughts.

Saturday, February 10, 2024

The weather again

We’ve been waiting..and waiting..for two warm days in a row and it’s not going to happen for another week. Here in Arizona, we snowbirds feel cheated when we have to wear sweatshirts and jackets for days on end.

There is so much to do here, even in a one- to two-hour drive but really only ideal on a warm weather day. Right here in Mesa with spectacular views of the Superstition Mountains, we have beautiful walking trails and parks. Most restaurants feature patio dining and on Saturdays there’s a sidewalk market and art fair.

Fifteen minutes south of Mesa is Queen Creek and the Olive Mill where you can tour the olive groves and learn how olive oil is made, shop for all-things-olive and have lunch on their beautiful outdoor grounds, most often complete with a guitarist strumming out tunes as you dine.

On the way back home, there is Schneff Farms that boasts the best peach 🍑 pie, not to be missed, with fruit from their own peach trees. To the north, we have Saguaro Lake and a bit further we can see wild horses running free. A bit further yet towards Payson, the mountain scenery has left us breathless. Or maybe it’s the windy curves in the road on the two-lane highway. Just a tad bit scary for me.

Phoenix is just to the west with cultural offerings galore. You name it, it’s there. A large botanical garden with Dale Chihuly glass sculptures, and a wonderful zoo are at the edge of Tempe and Phoenix. Tucson is two hours away, while just a little further is the artsy town of Tubac with high end art shops and an art museum. A must if you’re near here.

Then there’s the border crossing to the town of Los Algodones, Mexico, just over the border from Yuma, the Colorado River and Baja, California. It was a lovely weather day when we were there which I mention because there’s a lot of walking involved and nothing indoors, at least not that we saw. 

Hubby bought a beautiful blanket there similar to these. There are very persistent hawkers everywhere following you around to try to persuade you to buy their wares. They don’t easily give up and my husband didn’t easily give in, but he was intrigued by this blanket. Many, as in very many people make a day trip to Algodones for dental work, eye exams and glasses, drugs (as in medications), and liquor. All because those things are incredibly cheaper there. And pure vanilla which you can buy in a large bottle for $10 makes the trip worthwhile.

This is sounding like a travelogue that evolved all by itself as my words usually do. And I haven’t even mentioned the charming Old Town Scottsdale, or Fountain Hills with its famous fountain that shoots green water on St. Patrick’s Day, 560 feet in the air. 

The fountain of Fountain Hills

But I think what I love most here is the Sonoran desert, especially in springtime with the most interesting flowers blooming on the wide variety of cacti. So much exploring to do.

So getting back to the subject at hand, these activities aren’t very enjoyable during these cold and wet days. But…when it warms up, I may be off and running.

Hope your days are bright and sunny. 😎 
Thanks for allowing me to share my thoughts and whine about the weather.


Friday, February 2, 2024

Becoming Real


“You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

Margery Williams - The Velveteen Rabbit, 1923


Although I’m not completely sure of the author’s meaning, I love The Velveteen Rabbit. It also inspired my post for today.

It has taken me a long time, I mean very long, to become Real. I take that to mean the opposite of Artificial. Or phony. I hope those labels don’t describe me, but People Pleaser is a label you could accurately attach to me. I rarely felt like I had approval growing up…from parents, teachers, etc. And I often wondered what was wrong with me.

Now, of course, I realize it was somewhat the sign of the times. A child of the 1950’s. The oldest of six. Much was expected and most times I didn’t feel like I got it right or measured up. Hard as I would try.

And that’s where the people-pleasing took hold. IF I did this perfectly, I might get approval. IF I said the right thing, they’d like me. IF I went out of my way, it would be noticed. Maybe IF I tried harder. Or IF I just agreed with everyone, or disagreed when that was the desired answer, I’d be accepted. So for too many of my 78 years, that was my modus operandi.

Then my husband died. My whole life changed, down to its very core. 

For almost the first time, I realized that I only need to accept myself. I know without a doubt that my husband loved me, loved me unconditionally, and completely accepted who I was, flaws and all. I didn’t need to be perfect, didn’t always need to say the right thing or agree when I really didn’t. That is the gift he gave me and the gift he left me with. 

It just took me awhile to realize I was thinking and acting differently now, and that it was in looking back on our life together that brought about the change. I am more honest and open than ever before (beware) and it’s what I expect of others. At my age, what do I have to lose? What do any of us have to lose?

I had a coworker once who had lost a young daughter. There were a couple of untrue and undeserved comments about her in the office and knowing they were untrue, she shrugged it off and said, “I lost a daughter. There’s nothing more anyone can do to me.” 

So there’s nothing more anyone can do to me.  I don’t break easily and I don’t need to be carefully kept. Love me or not, accept me or not, I am who you see. 

To my mind, that is Real.       

 (But I still really hope you like me.) 💜 


Thanks for visiting and letting me share my random thoughts.

Monday, January 29, 2024

Monday, Monday

 Ah, back to Monday again. How does a week go so fast?

And this looks like another busy one. They say time goes faster for the elderly. They also say you’re busier after retirement than when you were working. Both are true. I’m not elderly but I certainly am busier. I can pack a lot into a day.


And I love checklists. They keep me focused and, well, driven. OCD? That’s me. 

Besides that, it’s such a feeling of accomplishment when you check off something on the list. And if you forget to add something you’ve already done, by all means add it to the list, simply because now you can check it off. 

I had a therapist once (yep, everyone needs one) tell me, addressing my obsession with to-do lists at work, to not look at it as an absolute, must-get-through-all-this-today or else, but to think of it as a menu. One where you select items, one at a time, to accomplish.

It was good advice. It makes it much more pleasant to go about your tasks as you’ve chosen what to do. And some things can wait and some simply don’t need to be done at all!

What’s on my checklist/menu for today?

Bake cupcakes. It rhymes with Monday.


Thanks for the visit today and for reading my ramblings. 



Friday, January 26, 2024

Here comes the sun


I woke this morning to sunshine streaming through the windows. 

Which pretty much tells you I wasn’t up at the crack of dawn. More like the crack of 9.  My Facebook friends post beautiful photos of the morning sunrise and I thank them because it’s the only way I’ll ever see that early morning phenomenon.

Anyway, it was wonderful to see that sunshine after the past several days of rain and cloud cover. Funny how it changes one’s mood and increases the energy level. I still love rainy days but there comes a point where I’ve had enough. 

So during the rainy days, I finished the church newsletter, caught up on the laundry, baked a big batch of bran muffins (recipe below) and did my share of relaxing.

I’ve been going through my roommate’s filing system. Actually, there was no system, just a lot of papers in folders going back to the beginning of time in no particular order. She and I carefully looked them over, filled a garbage bag and she advised me what file the surviving paperwork should go in for easy access.

She had hanging folders but no plastic tabs, so a trip to OfficeMax remedied that and I made labels with my handy-dandy Brother label maker. I bet you didn’t know my nickname is Label Queen. I label everything. When I labeled the refrigerator shelves (milk, the cheese drawer, vegetable crisper, deli shelf and leftover stuff shelf), my husband declared it “over the top” and just shook his head. 

Really? Do you think so? Can’t be too organized, I always say.

Here is the recipe for the bran muffins. Grab a BIG mixing bowl and remember, this mixture can be refrigerated for six weeks. But be sure to label them so you know the date you made them. 

And thanks for reading my random thoughts. You can also join as a Follower. You don’t get a discount but it’s nice for me. heehee